Just ask Yahoo....

http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=who+will+win+2004+election

I'm doing a speaking tour for a series of Microsoft MSDN events in early November.

I'll be in Auckland, Wellington and Christchurch talking about Web Service Architectures and the Microsoft Application Blocks.

When the registration site is posted I'll let y'all know the link.

From their mailbag....

HDN Cash writes:

I will bet you 10,000 dollars that you won't put your picture on the website. I will bet another 10,000 dollars that you are a fat, pasty white, patchouli-wearing liberal skank whore who would fuck limbaugh laying on the side of the road. How about this, go fuck yourself.

Dear HDN:

$10,000! You must be very successful. I like successful men. I tell you what. You put up the cash, Ill put up the pic. But youd lose the other ten grand, too. While I do not wear patchouli, I have been known to use a sprig or three in Michelles Famous Mint Jelly. I hear Limbaugh loves eating mint jelly on the side of the road, so in a way, youre half-right. Maybe just make the check out for $15,000 and well call it even?

Faithfully, Michelle

Disclaimers:

• Pledge-fulfilling sex must be consensual, legal, and generous. And safe. And hot.
• Acceptable sexual positions include, but are not limited to: missionary, doggy-style, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, leapfrog, butterfly, humpback whale, cling wrap, squashing of the deck chair, accordion, reverse piggy-back, advanced ("twin") leapfrog. Male-male, female-female, group, and oral variations of these positions can also be used to satisfy the pledge.
• Taking the pledge indicates a good-faith effort to abide by its provisions. Pledge-takers who have violated withholding provisions become effective non-voters, and are barred from sex with fellow pledge-takers.
• Pledge-takers who fail to vote are forbidden from masturbating. (Exemption: pledge-takers who are not eligible to vote are encouraged to masturbate frequently.)
• "Cybersex" does not satisfy the pledge, dorkwad.
• Non-voters may render themselves eligible for sex with American Heroes by voting at least twice in local, primary, and/or 2006 congressional races. Those voting in only one such race qualify to perform, but not receive, oral sex on American Heroes.
• Achievement of a Votergasm during election-night sex is probable, but not guaranteed. Those encountering difficulty reaching Votergasm are encouraged to slow things down, talk about it, and reduce the pressure. Other techniques include the use of massage oils, toys, "dirty talk," "ballot stuffing," and "exit polls."
• Per the U.S. Constitution, children conceived on election night are eligible for gigantic interest-free loans from the U.S. government, and special t-shirts.

From the ever onto it DPF

The BBC reports on an excellent initiative in the US to get more people voting. Sex!

People can pledge at Votergasm to either:

* withhold sex from non-voters for a week after election night

* have sex with another voter on election night as well as withholding sex from non-voters for a week

* commit themselves to having sex with another 2004 voter as well as turning down all non-voters until the 2008 vote.

OK... so the neglect stems from working my ass off at the moment... so here a a few quick link reposts from others

Bill has some good religion mockery...

NEWNAN, Ga. (AP) - Across the Bible Belt this Halloween, some little ghosts and goblins might get shooed away by the neighbors - and some youngsters will not be allowed to go trick-or-treating at all - because the holiday falls on a Sunday this year.

Rory reviews Team America..... in true Rory style....

I wear a purse (well, it's a camera bag, but it functions as a purse), I like gay people just as much as I like everybody else, and I think it's OK to swear in churches (I don't actually do this, as I don't go to churches, but the concept doesn't offend me).

However, I am not PC...

I'm buying that man a beer- I too used to wear a lovely man bag...... but have since dumped my bulky Pocket PC for a Smartphone....... so don't need it any more...

DPF has some good bullet points on the John Tamihere 'thing'....

Today on TV One and Three we found out about the free Land Cruiser worth $40,000 which had Waipareria pay lease payments on, right up until four months ago

and... he also links to ... McCully and the Sex Industry - A Guide to Occupational Health and Safety in the New Zealand.

[via DPF]

A well-known and inspirational speaker, Mike Tamaki, has unwittingly been caught up in the latest tertiary education funding scam says Nationals Education spokesman, Bill English.

I have been advised that people who attended a business lunch in Timaru earlier this year were told that they could stay and hear Mr Tamaki speak if they filled out a form enrolling them at this course at Aoraki Polytechnic.

This form made their attendance at the lunch an official community education enrollment, says Mr English.

This stuff drives me insane! Half of these provincial Politechs couldn't educate a cow in a bloody milking shed. As an employer and taxpayer it makes my blood boil seeing this sort of crap masquerading as education.

P.S. New category added - Taxpayer Ripoffs

The UPS guy delivered my Sinulator the morning of the day I was giving a party. I signed, sent him on his way and returned to my preparations. It wasn't until hours later, draped around the room with about 20 friends, that I remembered my new toy.

The Sinulator is a device that lets you connect a sex toy to your computer so that other people can control it for you over the internet. After announcing to the room that I had one of these, I really had no choice but to open the box and pass the thing around.

http://www.wired.com/news/culture/0,1284,65064,00.html

That's right. Kognition has shifted offices... again.

We shifted into the Centre for Innovation at Otago University.

We've pimp'd up the office pretty nicely (see photos below).

One is of the area we call the Glasshouse- it's got two all glass walls looking out onto the University and we've got nice leather couches, cacti and an air hockey table in there.

The other half of the room is where we work- though it also has our DJ Setup. It'll also be where our big ass server rack is gonna go when it arrives- servers have arrived, just no rack yet.

Anyway- check the photos.... Bill, come visit, Casey, export yaself here

IMAGE_00093.jpg (32.53 KB)

IMAGE_00094.jpg (26.49 KB)

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OK... so some Density Raver has come back and posted some Jesus Speak in my comments...

Herewith some reply... theirs in blue.... mine in black.

God made the world. The world did not 'just happen'.

Science and Mathematics would tell you that there is a pretty good statistical chance that the world did just happen and then evolve- well some of us evolved....

God is the most powerful thing that exists.

OK... let me just run off and prepare a suppository form Atomic Weapon.... and we'll see who or what really holds the power around here.

It's up to us weather we choose to love him or not, but there are consequences to what we choose.

And I guess it's also up to him as to weather [sic] he grants us each some basic literacy skills....

There is good and evil, God and the devil, and there is heaven and hell.

Oh ... Can I be evil...  Evil is so much more fun than good.

The devil HATES you - he wants ... to kill your joy and ruin your future.

So basically the Devil wants me to become a Destiny Church Parishoner...

Hell is a horrifying place, where there is the worse torment and agony - and it ever ends. If you go there you will stay there for eternity.

Worse than what? Listening to an hour of Brian Tamaki every morning?

In Matthew 5:17-18 Jesus upheld the commandments in the Old Testament saying he had come to fulfil, and not abolish those laws. One law is Leviticus 18:22 where God commands do not have sex with a man as with a woman, that is detestable.

You can't 'have sex with a man as with a woman'... it's physically impossible.... Oh... unless the woman is super kinky... but I guess that's detestable too?

So the Jews needed little convincing.

Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.  Jesus through Paul therefore calls homosexuality a perversion.

Perverse or otherwise, some people seem to find it jolly good fun.... so who am I to intrude... More importantly what entitles you and your god to intrude given that many of them think religion to be little more than a self perpetuating fairy tale..

http://www.techpaq.co.nz/techbyte/2004_September/TP_IngramMicro_Acquisition.pdf

We are pleased to announce that Ingram Micro Inc. (NYSE: IM), the worlds largest technology distributor, has entered into an agreement to acquire Tech Pacific and combine our companies to better serve you and the Asia Pacific region.

Kirk posted something titled 

They don't talk politics on ESPN or The Weather Channel

Bill and Casey are quick off the mark on this one and given my propensity to rant and rave on everything from politics to religion I'm gonna pop my two cents in as well.

I have the advantage that I'm not beholden to anybody when it comes to blogging. I'm my own boss, host my blog on my own server and as such tend to blog about what I feel like. I feel absolutely no obligation to people who read this blog other than to try my darnedest to be accurate and substantial in the things that I post. If you don't like my politics (devout libertarianism) then don't go near my politics category. If you don't like my religious views (devout atheism) then avoid my sacreligion category.... simple huh! Oh, and if you don't like my spelling, typos and grammar... bugger off right now!

I'm no 'self proclaimed expert', but, I take an active interest in politics and in my wonderful democracy that's a darn site better than many useless inert nothings manage. Kirks post almost infers that ones aptitude or capability in different pursuits are wholly unrelated. I think quite the contrary is true- from what i have observed if someone is a clued up cookie in one aspect of life (say technology) then chances are they'll be pretty smart in other areas as well. It's my submission that if your technical content is sufficiently useful to warrant someone like Kirk subscribing then you are most unlikely to be the sort of person who would make 'vote for X' or 'Y is a moron' posts. Rather, you are probably likely to be the sort of person who will at least have something useful, thought provoking and insightful to say on politics- whichever side you happen to say it about.

*Please note that the above applies to politics only. I shall continue to feel unrestrained in so far as calling religious people closed minded moronic idiots (in the nicest possible way). Religion being a fantasy about which nothing useful, thought provoking or insightful can ever be said.

OK... so a few weeks back I posted on a particularly brazen young Destiny Church follower who had been commenting a great deal over on DPFs blog..

A comment on that entry has kinda sparked my interest again... turns out our Destiny supporter is a Health Promoter (whatever that is) @ the Taranaki DHB. Anyway, interest rekindled, I thought I'd whiz through and see what proportion of posts looked like they were done on employers (read Taxpayer of NZ and thus me) time.

Let's be generous and assume a 12am to 1:30pm lunch window....

1. Thursday 19th August, 12:13pm - Covered by our lunch window
2. Friday 20th August 12:02pm - So far so good
3. Friday 20th August 3:50pm - OK... Friday afternoon... was it Beer O'Clock maybe? Do 'health promoters' do Beer O'Clock?
4. Firday 20th August 3:56pm - As above... now at this stage I'm worried I'll make a fool of myself because tommorow is a weekend!
5. But it's OK... because we get radio silence until... she's back @ work on Tuesday the 24th @ 3:02pm - Now please tell me it's not Beer O'Clock on Tuesdays.
6. Wednesday August 25th @ 9:06am... doing morning 'emails'?
7. Wednesday August 25th @ 10:03am... still doing morning emails?
8. Wednesday August 25th @ 10:04am... sure is a lot of emails?
9. Wednesday August 25th @ 10:08am... can you say Acceptable Use Policy?
10. Thursday 26th August @ 4:32pm... again... close enough to end of play to be a gimme.
11. Friday 27th August @ 08:46am... without seeing the IP logs you've got to let this one slip for the possiblity of it being written @ home. Do civil service types get to work before 9am?
12. Friday 27th @ 10:02am.... this one was a WHOPPER... must have been a good 20 minutes worth. Lurker even comments -  I'm guessing naki-girl doesn't hold down a full-time job at the moment... I'm guessing naki-girl doesn't hold down a full-time job at the moment... ... dunno- are 'Health Promoters' full time?
13. Friday August 27th @ 10:36am.... another biggie
14. Friday August 27th @ 10:58am.... I ain't seeing much health promoting going down....
15. Friday August 27th @ 11:35am... TGIF!
16. Friday August 27th @ 11:49am... could call it a tithe @ this rate
17. Friday August 27th @ 11:52am... thats 1 and 1/2 hours by my count.
18. Friday August 27th @ 12:01pm... LUNCH TIME
19. Friday August 27th @ 12:06 pm... still lunch...
20. Friday August 27th @ 12:18 pm... and still lunch...
21. Friday August 27th @ 12:36 pm... and still lunch... but then wasn't 10:30 till midday lunch today...
22. Friday August 27th @ 12:54 pm ... still within our lunch window
23. Friday August 27th @ 01:17pm ... Just as well we allowed for a long 'merchant bankers' lunch
24. Friday August 27th @ 01:24pm ... lunch is almost over
25. Friday August 27 @ 02:32pm ... and now lunch is indeed over.
26. Friday August 27th @ 03:01pm... another monster post this afternoon.
27. Friday August 27th @ 03:09pm ... almost Beer O'Clock.... surely
28. Friday August 27th @ 03:17pm ... it's been a long day at the coal face really hasn't it.... driving Gods Chariot...

... and that's all folks... so let's summarise.

28 posts. 9 within our lunch window, 1 that we suspect as being an early morning not @ work post. So that leaves 18 posts on work time... many of them pretty substantial. Seems god promotion won over health promotion this week.